Where I Belong Read online

  Chapter Eight

  Eva didn’t get far. When she didn’t hear anyone coming after her, she sat down on the deck stairs and buried her face in her hands as tears streamed down her face.

  They looked so much older, she thought as she cried. Her mother had lost twenty pounds, easily. Her father, well, his hair was a whole lot greyer than the last time she’d seen him.

  In the past year, she’d avoided the news. Avoided any means of finding out about them. She’d even avoided hearing about Nate’s funeral.

  The thought of it had her heart aching. Several times in the past, she’d broken into places, looking for pills she could take to remove the pain. But each time, she’d come up empty.

  Then in LA, things had turned scary. So, she hitched several rides and ended up in the back of some guy’s truck heading into wine country. That was until the old man pulled off to the side of the road and tried to grope her. So she’d hit him over the head with a chunk of wood and stolen his truck.

  She’d gotten nervous after seeing a cop car just outside of St. Helena, and decided to ditch the truck. She’d seen enough movies, but putting the clunker into neutral and pushing it off to the side of the road hadn’t turned out the way she’d planned. She’d missed seeing the transformer buried behind the bushes. When the truck hit the small box, the entire roadside lit up with sparks.

  She’d been so scared and worried someone had seen her that she spent the next few days hiding out in the woods. She’d gotten soaking wet from the rains that followed and believed she’d just reached the end of her trip. That was until she stumbled upon the old cabin.

  She’d easily found the key under the mat and had helped herself to any canned food there was. The place had been a shack, really. The place smelled of dust, but was comfortable enough that she’d planned on sticking around until she decided her next step. Since there wasn’t any running water or electricity, she planned a few trips to other homes nearby to break into them, looking for anything she could use.

  Now she knew it was Rafe’s cabin she’d stayed at. She’d asked him why he held onto it if he always stayed with his sisters.

  “It was my dad’s,” he’d answered. “We used to go hunting there. We’d lock ourselves away all weekend, just the two Rowan men.” He’d smiled at the memory.

  “Why don’t you go back?” she’d asked.

  His smile had faded— “Too many memories. My dad died a few years back”—then he’d changed the subject.

  Too many memories. That statement played over in her mind. Maybe that was why seeing her parents hurt so bad? Too many memories of Nate.

  She couldn’t look into her father’s eyes without seeing Nate’s. Pain shot down her arms and legs as her tears slid down her nose.

  Nate. He’d been so full of fun. He’d always laughed, joked, and questioned everything. She could still remember the first time she’d seen his goofy face.

  He was such an ugly baby. A burst of laughter escaped her and she buried her face deeper in her hands. It was true. His head was too big, his eyes were swollen, and he was an odd color of purple and red. But then he’d looked up at her and smiled, and she’d fallen in love with her little brother.

  Her parents hadn’t planned for another child. She and her brother were eight years apart. Who waits eight years to have another kid?

  She closed her eyes on the pain. Nate hadn’t been planned, but he’d been the joy of all three of their lives. He’d been the only reason her family had stayed together. Before him, her parents had been using the word divorce an awful lot.

  In her young mind, she’d believed she hadn’t been strong enough to hold them together, but Nate’s love had. Now he was gone.

  Her shoulders hunched.

  “You okay, hellcat?” Just hearing Rafe’s voice soothed her heart.

  She sniffled and wiped her nose on the sleeve of her jacket.

  “Not really.” Her eyes moved up to him. He was standing over her, then moved to sit beside her. His arm came around her shoulders and pulled her close.

  “You’ve got to see them sometime,” he said.

  “I know.” She sighed.

  “Are you afraid?” he asked as she rested her head on his shoulder.

  “Not really.”

  “Then what?”

  “Sad,” she said, closing her eyes and turning her face towards the sun, enjoying its warmth. “I miss him so much.” She felt tears roll down her face again.

  “They miss you,” he added, causing her to hunch her shoulders.

  “They miss Nate,” she added.

  “And you.” The voice came from behind them and she stiffened. Turning, she saw her parents standing a few feet away from them. Her father’s arm was around her mother’s shoulders. Tears streamed down both of their faces. “We miss you,” he repeated.

  “So much,” her mother added. “Too much.”

  When they both opened their arms, she rushed into them and held on tight.

  ***

  Rafe sat in his sister’s kitchen and occasionally glanced over at the trio in the living room. He’d heard a lot of sniffling and even some laughter. Which, if he believed any of the psychology books he’d read throughout the years, was a good sign.

  The oil in the pan splashed out and burned the back of his hand for the fifth time, causing him to curse under his breath.

  “Are you sure you’re okay in there?” Eva’s mother, Julia, asked for the third time.

  “Everything’s fine,” he called back. “It’s almost ready.”

  What had he been thinking? Cooking for the family. He hadn’t been thinking. That’s why. He’d only thought about keeping Eva in his sights. He didn’t want her to slip out of town with her parents without him getting a chance to tell her how he felt.

  Hell, he’d blurted it out to her parents easy enough, but hadn’t the nerve to tell her himself. Smooth move.

  Moving the chicken from the stove, he tossed the salad, poured the rice into a bowl, and laid the chicken slices over the vegetables.

  Then he walked over, popped the top on his sister’s most expensive bottle of wine, and poured three glasses, then pulled out a bottle of water for Eva.

  “Something smells wonderful,” Eva said, walking over to him and wrapping her arms around him. “Thank you,” she whispered just before she laid her lips on his.

  “Dinner’s ready.” He smiled down at her.

  “I can’t tell you how much we appreciate you cooking for us,” Harry said, walking into the room behind his wife.

  “Rafe has a knack for cooking,” Eva said as she smiled up at him.

  “Thank you,” Harry said again. “For everything.” His eyes landed on his daughter. “Eva told us...what you did for her.”

  He nodded and swallowed the lump in his throat.

  Over dinner, the room grew quiet. When the food was almost gone, Harry glanced up at him and asked him about his career.

  Rafe talked briefly about finishing school only months before and how he was looking for a place to settle down and start his own practice.

  “Have you thought about Seattle?” her father asked.

  Eva’s eyes turned towards his and he could see the fear spike behind them.

  “Actually, since my family is here, locally, I was thinking of opening a practice in St. Helena.” He had been thinking about opening shop here. For years he’d done everything he could to leave St. Helena behind him, but now, it just seemed right.

  Harry nodded. “You can’t go wrong with sticking close to home.” He reached across the table and took his wife’s hand. “We both grew up in Auburn. The business headquarters are in Seattle, but we still have the same house Eva and Nate grew up in, outside of the city.”

  This time, at the mention of her brother’s name, all Rafe saw behind her amber eyes, was love.

  “I’m going to go back with them,” she blurted out, causing his heart to stop altogether.

  “What?” He turned quickly towards her. “You
are?”

  “Just for a while,” she said, looking down at their joined hands. “Then I plan on coming back to St. Helena.” Her eyes moved up to meet his. “For good.”

  Her parents quietly excused themselves from the table.

  “You are?” He felt his heart kick-start again.

  She nodded, a smile slowly spreading on her lips. “I had hoped you’d go with me. Dad told me what you said.”

  His heart stopped again; this time, before it started up, it did several flips first.

  “Okay...” He reached for his wine, only to have her hand stop him. Her parents moved out of the booth smoothly, and walked into the next room quietly.

  “I’d like to hear it from you, instead.” She shifted until his hand covered her heart.

  He swallowed, his eyes locked on hers.

  “Eva, I love you. I don’t know when it happened, but there it is. Raw and the truth.” He held in a chuckle. “I can’t imagine a day without you. I want to fall asleep with your eyes being the last thing I see at night and wake up seeing your smile first thing in the morning. I want to...damn.” He jerked out of his chair and bumped his knee, cursing again. “Hang on.” He threw up a finger. “I have”—he rushed from the room, jogging past her parents sitting on the sofa, who were looking at him like he was crazy.

  He rushed into his bathroom, yanked open the door and cursed again. Swooping up the small mess, he carted it into the kitchen, only to have Eva gasp.

  “I want to have this with you.” He set the small tan and white dog into her lap. “Guess I’ll be the first one to clean up Bob’s mess.” He glanced back towards the hallway with a frown and tried not to think of the hell his sister was going to give him for it.

  Then he knelt down beside her. “I got him a few days ago. He had to get his shots and a few things I hold very dear to myself, chopped off, otherwise I would have given him to you then.”

  He watched as tears streamed down her cheeks.

  “Eva, I want this.” He nodded to the dog, then over to her family. “I want you. If you’ll have me.”

  Instead of answering, she wrapped her arms around his neck and held on tight.

  “That had better be a yes, young lady,” her father scolded from the other side of the room. “Any man who has balls enough to propose shortly after meeting the family, is man enough to marry our daughter. Wouldn’t you agree, Julia?”

  “Yes,” her mother sniffled and burst out.

  “Yes!” Eva said, placing her lips on his, as the puppy started licking them both. “On one condition.”

  He sighed. “Anything.”

  “His name is not Bob.” She laughed as he closed his arms around his family. His life. His love.

  Other books by Jill Sanders

  The Pride Series

  Finding Pride

  Discovering Pride

  Returning Pride

  Lasting Pride

  Serving Pride

  Red Hot Christmas

  My Sweet Valentine

  Return To Me

  Rescue Me

  The Secret Series

  Secret Seduction

  Secret Pleasure

  Secret Guardian

  Secret Passions

  Secret Identity

  Secret Sauce

  The West Series

  Loving Lauren

  Taming Alex

  Holding Haley

  Missy’s Moment

  Breaking Travis

  Roping Ryan

  Wild Bride

  Corey’s Catch

  The Grayton Series

  Last Resort

  Someday Beach

  Rip Current

  In Too Deep

  Swept Away

  Lucky Series

  Unlucky In Love

  Sweet Resolve

  Silver Cove Series

  Silver Lining

  French Kiss

  Entangled Series – Paranormal Romance

  The Awakening

  The Beckoning… Coming Soon

  The Ascension… Coming Soon

  For a complete list of books: http://jillsanders.com

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are either the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  WHERE I BELONG by Jill Sanders

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  About the Author

  Jill Sanders is The New York Times and USA Today bestselling author of Sweet Small-Town Contemporary Romance Series, Thrilling Romantic Suspense Series, Sexy Western Romance Series, and Intriguing Paranormal Romance novels. She continues to lure new readers with her sweet and sexy stories. Her books are available in every English-speaking country and in audiobooks as well as being translated into different languages.

  Born as an identical twin to a large family, she was raised in the Pacific Northwest and later relocated to Colorado for college and a successful IT career before discovering her talent as a writer. She now makes her home along the Emerald Coast in Florida where she enjoys the beach, hiking, swimming, wine-tasting, and of course writing.

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